Aging Parents

More and more young people are part of this so-called "Sandwich generation". This is the generation that is sandwiched between taking care of parents and young children. It is not uncommon to have to juggle your daughter's dance practice with your mother's doctor's appointments. Well, I have arrived. I knew that this day would come for me. You see, I was born when my mother was 44 years old. That doesn't sound quite so alarming now, but imagine in the late seventies when all of my friends parents' were in their late twenties and my parents were both balding and had gray hair in their early fifties. They started young then. My friend's parents didn't call my parents by their first names as was usually customary; it was "Mr. and Mrs. Griffin"

Anyhow, I am so incredibly blessed to have a mother that is in relatively good health at 81 years old. She looks good too and I so hope that I get those genes. But, as she gets older, I have found that I have to ask her questions repeatedly to decipher if she understands what has been communicated. I have found that my once "take no nonsense" mother has become passive and it is best to call physician offices, credit card companies and the like, on her behalf. I find myself memorizing her incredibly long medication list & schedule all the while keeping track of my kid's last influenza vaccine, dental appointment and current event assignment. It's a daunting task.

Just as employers are trying to be more sympathetic to parents of young children, I feel like there needs to be more focus on responsibilities in regard to older parents. Just as adequate child care is a concern for working parents, so is advocacy for our parents. It takes time to schedule and coordinate doctor visits for both the kids and the parents.

With parents living longer comes the incredible amounts of prescription medicine that must be taken. My mother has bottles upon bottles of pills lined up on her chest of prayers. They are to be taken upon waking on an empty stomach, only with meals, once a day, twice a day, as needed and at bedtime. It's difficult for me to keep straight and I have youth on my side! There has to be someone to provide that check and balance.

I've adopted a new way of thinking. I had been resistant to my mother getting older because I associated her aging with her ultimate death. To help me cope and so that I am more accepting and patient, I think of my mother now as my third baby. I have three: ages 4, 6, and 81.... and I wouldn't have it any other way. Until Next Time.... Embrace & Celebrate Longevity

Note: Comparing my mother to a baby is not meant to be disrespectful or imply that she is incapable of taking care of herself. It is rather an expression of my love for her and my willingness to protect and provide for her; just as I do for my children.